I have a problem with delayed ejaculation, and it bothers me a lot. At first, I thought it was great that I could go for a long time, but now its just ridiculous. I'm thinking that it might be causing problems with my partner as well (I fear she might think that I don't find her attractive or something because I can't reach orgasm with her). We have tried different positions and techniques, but nothing seems to work, and I often end up masturbating to orgasm while she watches (or helps on occasion) after she has had enough of intercourse.
Anyways, I just want to know if anyone could help me out. Any advice, offers for treatment of some kind , or anything really would be appreciated.
There are a number of questions to consider before referring you for more specialized consultation:
Are you having any difficulty getting and maintaining erections? If so, is it just when you are having intercourse? Are you having morning erections normally? Can you stimulate yourself to orgasm normally?
If erections are normal and the problem, as you describe, is delay in orgasm, when did this start to be a problem? Do you have delay when you are masturbating without a partner present?
Are you on any medications or drugs, prescribed or non-prescribed? What is your alcohol intake?
Do you have any chronic medical or metabolic illnesses?
Are there issues of stress, anxiety or depression that you are currently experiencing that may be affecting your ability to reach orgasm?
In young men, the most common cause of delayed ejaculation is their use of alcohol or other drugs/medications that adversely affect sexual functioning. Discontinuing use is the key. If you are on prescribed medication, then discuss potential side effects with your prescribing provider before discontinuing so that an alternative can be found. The next most common reason for this problem is related to psychological factors.
The Student Health Center can do screening blood work to make sure you have normal hormonal levels. The Counseling Center can do an initial intake to screen for anxiety and mood disorders, and can refer you to local therapists with expertise in sexual dysfunction issues.