Q:

I visited my hometown not that long ago and ran into a guy I knew there when I was 18. I thought he was charming and all that b.s. REEEEALLY charming. Now that I know him better I think he exhibits traits of a serial killer.

I don't know what to do. My judgment could be way off because all I know about 'serial killers' comes from movies, and I don't even know if any of that is accurate. Plus, even if I find that he meets some of the criteria, I wouldn't know what to do.

The worst part is that I have a fatty crush on this guy, so my psychological guards are down and I don't know how that will affect decisions about my personal safety.

I feel like a fool in this situation because obviously if you think someone is crazy you should stay away from them. But I am finding that a little difficult...

 

A:

First off, there are no classic traits of a serial killer unless they really are a serial killer. There are many charming sociopaths who never kill anyone but do create wreckage in people's lives simply because they don't care about other people's feelings.

If you are having intuitive doubts about this man's honesty, integrity and safety, then stay away. Tell others you trust to help you stay away. Being attracted from afar is no crime, but is also a waste of time and energy.

If you are doubting your ability to discern a safe potential partner, then counseling is a good idea. You deserve far better than someone who will do you in emotionally, if not physically.

~The Doc