Relaxation Instructions
Relaxation is defined by very specific physical and psychological parameters which include: lowered heart rate, reduced muscle tension, slower brain wave activity, reduce blood pressure, quiet mind (less chatter), reduced sense of urgency, reduced critical or judgmental thinking, reduced “tunnel vision”, etc. Being able to relax is results from applying specific skills; it is not the same as just listening to music while you read, or drive a car. While listening to relaxing music may be good for you and help you calm down, it doesn’t build skills and advance you ability to mange your stress response for the future. The following guidelines are intended to help you get the most out of your relaxation practice so that your ability to relax is strengthened, and your base levels of stress are generally lower. Consider these instructions as suggestions. If something doesn’t work well for you, feel free to modify or change it. You are the one most knowledgeable about your own body and its needs. As you become proficient in relaxation, many of the following guidelines may become unnecessary. Keep in mind that the long range goal is to change your base level of stress in your body. Through repeated exposure to deep states of relaxation you will develop a much greater ability to sustain your composure under stress. The process is very similar to physical conditioning- regular exercise slowly leads to increased stamina, strength and muscle tone. In this case you are developing the ability to maintain a relaxed and steady composure even under very stressful conditions.
Type of relaxation exercise to practice. There are a wide variety of relaxation strategies available. Some are long (30 minutes or more) others are very short (15 seconds). It is usually best to practice both long and short strategies daily so that you both lower your stress threshold over time, and have a well developed quick relaxation response to unpredictable stressful situations. Relaxation strategies can be divided into two general camps: those that have an emphasis on physical relaxation, and those that are mostly focused on mental relaxation. Pick the ones that best fit your particular needs. Physically oriented techniques include: Stretching, Ti Chi, Progressive Relaxation, Yoga, and others. Mental techniques include those such as Autogenics, Open Focus, Meditation, Guided Imagery and self-hypnosis.
Frequency of practice: Twice a day is good and better yet is three times a day. Try to establish a regular time to practice and practice at least 4-5 times a week. The body is a creature of habit- take advantage of this. Once a good habit is established, regular practice becomes easier and more effective.
Time of practice: Try to practice the same time each day to establish regular rhythm. Good times to practice may be in the morning before you start your daily activities, or at night prior to going to bed. Do not sleep during practice, as this does not lend to developing good skills! If you fall asleep during practice keep the exercises shorter, practice sitting up, and don’t practice too late in the day. Also check to make sure you are getting enough rest at night!
Duration of a practice session: Relaxation training is also concentration training. When you first start, you may find you focus is weak or fragmented. Your concentration will get better as you practice over time. Start with fairly short practice sessions and build to longer practice times. You may start with as short as 1 minute several times a day, and build to about 20 to 25 minutes once or twice a day.
Setting: Relaxation training should occur in an environment which fully supports you in your goal to become completely relaxed. Ideally the room should be not be too bright and should be comfortably warm- not too hot or cold. Try to set up your practice to avoid interruptions, especially at first. Unplug the phone (or turn the ringer off), let family and friends know you would like to not be disturbed. As your skills become more durable, you will be able to practice relaxation regardless of interruptions. It is even suggested that as your skills become more advanced, you deliberately practice in more challenging settings. This is a very important part of relaxation practice- so that you can use it in “real life”.
Preparation: All restrictive clothing should be loosened or removed prior to practice. It is also recommended that you go to the bathroom before practice. If you have something on your mind which might distract you, either attend to it, or write it down so that you are free to concentrate and get the most out of your practice session.
Practice posture: During initial practice sessions you should be very comfortable. You should be in a posture which allows your muscles to relax completely. A good question to ask to see if this is true is “If my body went completely limp during a practice session, would that be OK?” Your arms and legs should not be crossed (this tends to block blood flow). If you lie on your back, you might want to put a towel or pillow under your knees to support your lower back. Also note that since cold air sinks, if you practice on the floor, it may be a bit cooler, so consider using a blanket. Eventually you need to learn to relax in a variety of postures, again so that you may apply your skills to real life. After you are proficient in one posture, move to others such as sitting, standing and even walking (for the brief techniques).
Passive concentration: Regardless of which techniques you choose to practice, a key mental device is “passive concentration”. The opposite of passive concentration is goal directed concentration, which almost always increases nervous system activation. Passive concentration is an “allowing”, non-judgmental, non-critical approach to a task. Instead of analyzing, try simply noticing and watching what happens when you practice relaxation. If you are judgmental, your ability to relax will be greatly compromised. Instead, watch your body and mind from the perspective of a disinterested by-stander. Your ability to do this will improve with practice. As you get better, you will also find that passive concentration is a transferable skill- you will be more able to stay detached from situations which cause you stress.
Using your breath cycle: You will probably notice that your exhalation in your breathing cycle is often correlated with a progressive deepening of your relaxation. Each time you exhale, your body tends to relax a little further. You can take advantage of this natural fact by timing soothing phrases and relaxing images with your exhalation. Do not try to control your breathing during relaxation exercises. It may work better to first establish a comfortable breathing pattern first, and then start your relaxation practice.
Ending your practice session: Gradually bring yourself out of the session by attending to your breathing, the sounds around you and becoming aware of where you are, the time of day, etc. Stretch your arms and legs, and move a little before you attempt to stand.
Cautions: Should any of the following apply to you, consider getting relaxation training instruction from a qualified individual- a therapist, doctor or other person well acquainted with the following issues.
Deep states of relaxation can sometimes cause our normal emotional defenses to drop. This can sometimes lead to a emotional surge during a relaxation session (e.g., crying, laughing, elation or sadness). This is not uncommon, and usually is not harmful at all. Often this can lead to healing or a new awareness which helps us resolve an issue. It can be a surprise however. If you are aware that there are emotional issues “just below the surface”, be aware that they may surface when letting go.
Some folks may become anxious as they relax. This is called “Relaxation Induced Anxiety (RIA)” and it is a well known issue. There is research on this issue and there are different theories about why this happens. One theory suggests that RIA comes about due to quick physical changes in the nervous system which triggers an alarm response, another theory suggests that the anxiety comes about due to feeling a loss of control. Still another explanation is that the feelings of relaxation remind us of a near death experience - i.e., the last time there was an awareness of heart rate was during a heart attack, or the heightened awareness of breathing is a reminder of being in surgery or other dangerous situation.
If you are taking any medication, be aware that relaxation often increases the body’s sensitivity to medication and as a result you may get a stronger effect while relaxed. This especially true with pain medication, as well as with medication for anxiety and high blood pressure. Good skills in relaxation may allow you to get much more benefit from the medication you are taking. If you are taking pain medication, it is sometimes helpful to take the medication and then practice your relaxation within 30 minutes. This gives the medication a boost and supports its pain relieving effects.