Abusive Relationship Warning Signs

Abusive Relationship Warning Signs:

  • Your partner is jealous and possessive towards you.
  • Your partner tries to control you by being bossy and never considers your opinions.
  • Your partner scares you, making you afraid of how s/he will react to things you do or say.
  • Your partner has a quick temper and history of violence towards others.
  • Your partner pressures you into doing things that you do not want to do, such as having sex or breaking the law.
  • Your partner abuses illegal drugs and alcohol.
  • Your partner blames you for their problems, including those they brought upon themselves.
  • Your partner has a history of bad relationships.
  • Your partner believes that in relationships men should take the lead and women should follow.
  • Your family and friends have warned you about your partner or told you that they are worried for your safety.

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Remember, in a healthy relationship, each person is entitled to:

  • Have their needs be as important as their partner's needs.
  • Be free from blame or responsibility for their partner's behavior or actions.
  • Be able to voice their thoughts, feelings and opinions.
  • Be free from emotional, sexual, financial and physical abuse at all times.
  • Change their minds and not feel threatened.
  • Spend time with their friends and family and not feel pressured by their partner's jealousy.
  • Live without fear and confusion from their partner's anger.
  • Be treated with respect and never called names.
  • Negotiate conflict and make decisions about the relationship together.
  • Enjoy each other's dreams.

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If you feel you are in an abusive relationship:

  • Take it seriously. If you are in immediate danger, call the police.
  • Talk to someone about it, such as a friend, parent, clergy, or counselor. You are not alone.
  • Get yourself a safety plan; the CASAS Help Line can assist with this.
  • Call fro help to assist you with restraining orders, safety planning, education, support, and other services you may need.

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If you suspect someone is in an abusive relationship:

  • Voice your concerns.
  • Don't force them to break up with their partner until they are ready to do so on their own terms.
  • Tell them that they do not have to fact the situation alone.
  • Offer your support and guidance, and refer them to the appropriate resources.
  • Educate yourself about abusive relationships.

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Source: Adapted from Crime and Sexual Assault Services (CASAS) website, Student Affairs, WWU

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Page Updated 06.03.2013